You know you're getting old when...

Survey age questions didn’t bother me until now. I was always able to select from an age grouping that included a lot of twenty somethings. This morning I realized that this luxury will soon come to an end.

For now, I still get to select “22–34”, but come this summer, I’ll be hanging out with the geezer crowd on the porch, gazing wistfully at the whippersnappers cavorting carelessly on the dewy green lawns as the morning sun peers out from behind the veil formed by the branches of the weeping willow tree.

Punks - get off the damn lawn.