Bike Sex Man who had sex with bike in court - Telegraph

Man who had sex with bike in court - Telegraph:

A man has been placed on the sex offenders’ register after being caught trying to have sex with a bicycle. "The accused was holding the bike and moving his hips back and forth as if to simulate sex." Both witnesses, who were extremely shocked, notified the hotel manager, who in turn alerted the police. Mr. Stewart was placed on the sex offenders register but his sentence was deferred until next month.

I really don't quite know what to say about this. I mean, I like my bike and all, but...